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Just a Walking in the Shadow


I wrote this poem about a month ago when I was walking. As I was walking

was listening to music and thinking about who I was before I was with Christ. That person is a completely different being from who I am now. But still, that person’s shadow haunts me. He follows me and begs me to come back tohim, to feed him, to give him myself fully, and to indulge in who I once was. As Iwas walking, I wrote this poem while thinking of this verse. Mark 8:34 says,

“And He summoned the crowd with His disciples, and said to them, “If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross and follow Me.” I hope this poem helps you. Follow him, forget your past, and give all of yourself to him.

God Bless.

JC Pappan


Time has passed

But I can’t forget

The things that put you last

Oh Lord, I am in your debt

Mistake after mistake

Still, you love my sinful soul

Make me awake

Filling this unworthy hole

Deserving of death

Feeling alone and worn

Only you give me breathe

And fix what is torn


Show them you

Make them forget me

I am just blue

You are the key

These chains are tight

Consuming all of my being

You are the most bright

Lord you are freeing

Nothing can touch me

For I am your child

You set the decree

That I defiled

The standards

Your son set

I slandered

Played over like a cassette

Change this heart

Inside and out

Push me like a cart

Full of no doubt

I’ve played with fire

I’ve used all the vices

Now I’m in your choir

And I’m paying the prices

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"Jesus replied, '"Love the Lord your God with all your soul and with all your mind." This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: "Love your neighbor as yourself."'" Matthew 22:37-39 (NIV)

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